Monday, June 28, 2010

sickness reminder

Actue viral and flu was what the doctor pronounced, as he probbed my belly and back. Antibiotics were prescribed and I took to the bed, incapable of movement beyond tossing to the right and the left and then straight... in a sequence that made no sense.

Over dose of TV a few hours later, and nothing monumental occuring in the world, made me realize that there was some serious kick in the ass that i needed for me. This is what i ended up doing for myself............

post the mba fiasco, instead of figuring out a second plan of action, i leapt on the cloud called personal happiness and replaced my work station from the confines of my house to another place. Temporarily adjusting the surroundings, i candy flossed myself into believing that it was all o.k..

May came, the slugging work i ignored, with days of non buziness and some of hecticness, the wedding made me wonder where i stood in comparision to the other richer ppl there, who were just a year or two different from me, and June made me aware of the inner throb of stress/anxiety/drifting that i had been carrying on with for a long time. 

the fever bought it home....... I am ready to make a move to a larger organization. the task remains to find one that appeals to me and me to them, the connection needs to be located but the time to feel productive and useful for me is connected to this. its only when this is there that i enjoy leisure else leisure seems like a false waste of time!

on a unrelated note.a close pal got married yesterday, and another very close friend told me she is expecting ........................... think am getting to be glad for them. for sure there is a inner voice wanting the same for me, but it shall come when it does. amen