Tuesday, April 27, 2010

maids album

I groggily tried to piece together the jigsaw puzzle of Lalit Modi that Times was displaying for me in the papers, when Gun the maid came trooping over with her family album form a year ago.

They were pictures of a celebration, her daughter had come of age and they had organised a Function to facilitate the occasion. The girl was almost looking like a bride, as the snaps showed her changing from one saree to the other with the "traditional hands behind the ears" coy smiles being exchanged for the camera.

People jostled around her, as the album increasingly began to resemble a mock wedding. You know the kind of images i am talking about. Everyone standing straight and tall. Looking into the camera with the best look, evident that the wardrobe's best has been shaken to life. The background is usually a loud colour of red and blue stripes and the end of the album is always embarrassing pictures taken when people are shoving food down the throats.

This was all of that and more. .. it was a sense of accomplishment. A sense of pride and identity. I know she struggles for money, but those images were not one of desperation but one of attainment having arrived a statement where each of her 3 kids stared unashamedly into the camera and smiled. For them tommorrow has no sense of fear

I smiled as I saw her cocky son, get a image shot with his brown and white striped pants doing the talking. As her daughter, with the 3 new saree, laughed the shy laugh while the priest blessed her.

I GRIMACED, as her mother told me that she was looking to marry her off now. The daughter was in class 8th, almost 14 now and it was ripe for the wedding to be fixed within the year. It seemed cruel to be promised so much more in life, and not to have it delivered. For her not to be able to express her discontenment at the upcoming nuptials...

Read any book on Afghanistan, the Arab states, India most of it, parts of South East Asia and Africa, the lack of uniform women rights with respect to even the basic things like marriage, are denied. and what are the solutions? Education? Awareness? Bullshit. My maid is aware. She lives in a metropolitan,  may not be literate but is street smart her knowing the language shall not change her ability to make these decisions.

its deeper than that. its a collective thinking of what and how we value relationships. Of how we view a woman, married or single. That perception has to change

The term Spinster is such an ugly word. And Bachelor a happy one.
Ever wondered y?