Friday, July 16, 2010

admit to being lazy

All right I admit it

Have been a god awful writer and an even more awful observer of life in general for the past few days. Been wallowing in contentment for a change and even though, the flight back tomorrow lands me bang in the midst of an uncertain Blore, there is a certainty to me that makes this workable. 

Moving from the boring theme called me, here are a few snapshots of thoughts that have lingered and made a presence felt in the past few days. None are personal, all are critical. 

For Started, out librarians to shame by the amount of reading done... Reconnected with the library that the house has that without shame deals with the occult, energy healing and the role of the cosmos. Even diving in and out of the books, specially the ones that deal with past and future regressions bring home the futility and the simplicity of the lives we lead

Was coming home yesterday... at about 9.20pm in an auto on a crowded stretch of the road and old and frail man was moving his hand wheel momentum based wheel chair, the traffic honked around him before speeding off. He was old, clearly tired and yet for him to reach wherever he had to reach he had no option but to carry on and on and on turning the little wheel on his chair that shall move the bigger wheels and then the move.....  What had he done, or what a story his life must be to land him at that moment at that place... Not that he is isolated, turns out that as Indians our elderly care is disastrous.. am sure a lot of us dont have shock written all over our faces!

Am constantly awed by my friend M. He is the sole person who is constantly learning, and reinventing himself no matter how many things he juggles. Sample his average day. Morning a 5 km run, return home, read and manage his blog, write a script, head to work, handle house management, manage to come to a clinic and heal  patients as an alterantate healer, take time out to meditate, para glide and have atleast one research project that shall keep him engrossed for a year or two. Each of these must be perfected before moving on. Range of projects so far involved, kriya yoga, learning japense, Para Gliding, corporateworld, eastern philosophy. the list rapidly expands.

I am finally home and there is change. Have made excuses about how it is the heat, or the transport but the teenagerish need for me to be constantly on the move, meeting people, doing things and liking myself only and only if i was hyper active has been temporarily replaced by a sense of calmness and acceptance that life for me is slow right now.... the difference being was fighting this thought for a long time and have made peace with it

IT is what it is. It shall change when it will
i shall make it change
but it does not define/alter in anyway the person i am

wah wah. what i wise aunt i seem to be. 
To gng home and picking up the threads tomm