Friends made it happen

27th and 29th May were spent by the family getting the cars ready to go and pick up friends of the groom, arriving at different times from across the globe. Hong Kong, Australia, America, Germany, Britain, people flew in from different places, sat on a plane for hours just to be in India for 3-4 days to attend the wedding.

For some this was the very first trip to India, for some the 3-4th, but for each there was a spirit of living it up, being as non obtrusive as possible and instead focusing only on ensuring that they had as good a time. All of them got into the Kurta Payamas, had turbans on their heads, the girls managed sarees better than I ever could have ... and danced with gay abandon

As the bus packed with them moved towards the wedding procession, I saw my brother relax. The presence of each of them was a validation of the fact that he was loved, that they were there. As we struggled to find some common songs that strung the group together, the booze and the atmosphere did the magic of stringing each one together.

Made me think, as much as i wanted to.. do i have the bandwith to fly to say Ivory Coast for a friends engagement for 4 days and come back.. I would love to.... but i dont have the depth right now. Got back the gory reminders about (i) the power of currency conversion and (ii) the traveller spirit........ all combined..

But how does this sound as a wedding.... and this is my last post on the matter..

A lovely open air place, by the sea maybe...... a set of friends and family u and he call home, a breeze a solemn ceremony... a lovely sit down dinner with toasts and speeches, photos and memories, live music and dancing, lots of drinks and food. everyone exhausted sitting around a fire and songs being strung on the guitar and when the night is cast and the sun peeps through u head out with the sun to start life anew....

silence confuses

Yesterday, a close friend came over for a short while. We hung out over coffee and chatted. Or rather each ranted about their own life. Their was a pause and with some music on, we just lazed. It unnerved him, the silence that is. He wanted to hear chatter, updates, asked what else several times, reaffirmed friendship status, talk about Vidya Balan, travel, books, everything anything but silence.

Silence with a friend is a decently accurate measure of how good the friendship is.

If you can be in a room, with someone and not necessarily feel the need to converse, yet know that you are not failing in your duty as a host or he/she in the role as a guest that is friendship. To be able to come over, and depending on the mood, be giggly like school girls, sympathetic listeners, the controlling monitors or just the silent watchers. It the balancing act that gives the friendship some depth.

Mr. Dependable is my silent coffee buddy. We can sit at the same coffee table, each doing their thing, pick up a conversation, laugh let it lead to others and then drop back into an amiable silence. Knowing that it is perfect to break whenever need be.

GR was a good silent guest last week. Mr. Postit is showing value of being that too. Never thought, the chatter box me would ever even ponder about this, but like my brother says living alone makes you value silence a lot more.

When brother dear would come home, he would walk around with a baffled look on his face, questioning why the house was so noisy.  Only now do I get, staying alone teaches you to make friends with silence, where it no longer seems the enemy that needs to be drowned with music or tv or ceaseless conversations. But can actually be enjoyed.

Am definitely growing old. Pass the wrinkle cream, please